Thursday, July 2, 2009

My Fran and then my rant

As we weather yet another disappointment in the medical profession, I noticed how often we say, "they have no idea what she's going through". Heck, they have no idea who our Fran is. I began to gather some memories that stand out as a summary of her 25 years on planet earth.

She was such a good, happy baby. I used to worry she'd stop breathing in her sleep, because how else to explain this angelic child--that we'll lose her unexpectedly? As she grew, it became clear that her strong willed sis was in for some competition. It was difficult to determine who was bossier--with Lise it was obvious, but Fran was quietly bossy and strong willed.
Steadfastly loyal, she made friends easily. She excelled at math and science, loved to play sports and her flute. She played softball for as long as Little League would have her and then did a short stint in ASA. After that, band became her main activity. Which took her straight to marching band--four years in high school and 4 more in college (just like her sis).
As a small child she loved the outdoors, bicycling, hiking and camping and still does. She goes through times of voracious reading, devouring several books in a week. If you're down, she's the person to spend time with. She lifts your spirits while commiserating with you, guiding you and finding the hilarious in most every situation. That's Fran in a nutshell.

Today I took her to the first of two appointments at 11 AM, where the doctor proceeded to tell her that she was being kicked out of their pain program due to lack of progress. "How do you feel about that?", he prodded. "How do you #$!#$ think I think about it?!", she blurted out in a teary response. He told her she was acting like a teenager. Then he began to ask her if she'd done either of the two things another program doctor asked her to do this last Monday. Number one-no I didn't run out and buy my bed ridden girl a pedometer and number two-she hasn't had another headache to map since Monday. {sigh}
I feel like if they want to kick someone out of their program, it should be me. I was the one who decided I needed to be at work for the last 2 weeks of school instead of taking her to pool therapy twice a week and I was the one who called to cancel appointments when she had her last cold and migraine. Oh and there was that day when she couldn't make it after a rigorous PT appointment. It took a little over 4 days for her to recuperate from that. So hand me the lousy failing report card, but please oh please find a doctor willing to dig in and work on a diagnosis.
And now I'll push myself out of this chair and go help the girl cook. She recovers faster than I.


Kluver's Korner said...

What happened to compassion in the world of medicine!! Our love, thoughts and prayers continue to be with you both.

KandN said...

I don't know, Shirley, I don't know. BUT I decided there can be no compassion without understanding. They have to get there first and so far we've had one person (PT Kosboth) who achieved that beyond the first appointment.
Thanks for always being there!