Caught in a Book Passage

 Last night, as I read my current novel before bed, I found myself. There I was, tucked neatly within a paragraph, in words of the young main character, describing how his mother coped with life "by appeasing".

It was a revelation that felt like a slap across the face. And my first thought-- was appeasing something I adapted to ease my way in the world OR was I born that way? Appeasement--perhaps that was my tool as part of the family constellation. 

I read a book about family dynamics thirty plus years ago and it was the first time I found words to describe what I'd witnessed in my own family as a child. Families are like living breathing organisms, each member unknowingly influencing the behavior of the other members. 

And now, after a quick search, I see when you search for "family constellations", you mostly get information about the therapy that has blossomed since. And, once again, I mourn the rabbit hole searches without all of the commerce sites. Sigh. Love, K